He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

  Welcome to my First Guest Blogger, Linda Bolton!

Whether you've met on a dating site, were old high school friends, or friends introduced you, you run into the same issue. How do you know if he likes you?

We all have had experiences where you think you hit it off and then you never hear from him again. What did you do wrong? Did you do something wrong? Or was it him? How do you know if he's into you?

I have a guy friend that tells me if you're on a first date and he doesn't ask you for a follow-up date before you get into your car, he's not that into you. Do you think so? If that's the case, I have had quite a few dates that were not that interested in me.

I have a guy friend that tells me there are certain topics that are off limits on a first date; i.e. exes, money, sex, and illnesses. At fifty years old, there isn't that much else to talk about. Guess that explains, maybe, why they didn't set up a second date.

Then there's the person you've text and online chatted with for weeks. You totally have a ton in common. Then you have that first phone call. They don't sound how you expect. They aren't as witty on the phone as they are in chat. You think it might just be you and you agree to that first meeting. Yeah, lets just say, its as bad as the phone call. You don't want them to ask for a second date.

Ok, here's the exception...you chat and text great conversations. You talk on the phone and he's as witty and funny as you expected. You meet up and you talk about all the things you aren't supposed to. And, guess what? He even asks for a second date. So, what's the moral of the story? I have no idea what the winning combo is. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

Tell me about your experience. How do you know you'll ask for a second date? What tells you not to? What topics are taboo for you on the first date?

Some Soul Searching for Singles on V-Day

Posted by Hernibs on Feb 16th, 2012 and filed under Articles, Human-Relations. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

Home >> Articles >> Some Soul Searching for Singles on V-Day

If you’re single, or divorced, or maybe just out of a relationship and reading this, you are probably looking for useful information on how to improve your chances of finding a new partner.
There are gazillion websites and self-help books out there offering their expertise. Therefore it’s surprising to me that not all resources have been exhausted for advice; that singles are still not sure of how best to go about finding that elusive mate. Instead of giving tips today about your appearance, behavior, conversation, etc. on a date, I want to ask you a question that may surprise you: Would you date yourself?
Step 1: Take a critical look at yourself from the perspective of somebody else. Get out the big looking-glass! And I don’t mean just for your looks or sense of dress. Look deeper: How does this person project herself? Does she seem to be a happy individual? Is she content with her life? Is she somebody I would like to get to know and spend time with? What are her strong suits? It’s not a secret that people see themselves differently than other people do. May I say through tinted glasses?
Step 2: Look at your expectations. What do you expect from a partner? Is your list of requirements a mile long and realistic? What are the non-negotiable necessities about a partner and what is merely the icing on the cake, sorry, I mean on a mate for you? Where would you compromise? Can the standards of this person be met without resorting to a magic wand or cosmic intervention? What can be changed about you? Maybe something about your demeanor and attitudes? If you cannot answer these questions honestly – and I admit it is not easy – I suggest you get some help; be that a trusted friend for a good heart-to-heart discussion or a professional consultant for a make-over. You need someone with an unbiased critical eye to assess what you have to offer, but above all, you need honesty for this to work. By taking this approach to dating, the perspective shifts away from an ever demanding me and instead, subtly focuses on your counterpart. Our “Because You Are Worth it!” generation needs a colossal shift in consciousness and become more aware of reality and what is achievable. This may not be what you expected; but don’t knock it until you have tried.
http://angiesdiary.com/psychology/hum-rel/some-soul-searching-for-singles-on-v-day/

Would you Date yourself?

If you’re single and over 40 and maybe just out of a relationship, and reading this, you’re probably looking for useful information on how to improve your chances of finding a mate. There are gazillion websites and self-help books out there offering their expertise. Therefore it’s surprising to me that not all resources have been dredged for advice and that singles are still not sure of how to go about it.
Instead of giving tips today about appearance, behavior, conversation etc. on a date, I want to ask you a question that may surprise you: Would you date yourself?
Step 1: Take a critical look at yourself from somebody else’s perspective. Get the big looking glass out! And I don’t mean just for your looks or sense of dress. Look deeper: How does this person project herself? Does she seem to be a happy person? Is she content with her life? Is she somebody I would like to get to know? Spend time with? What are her strong suits?
It’s not a secret that people see themselves differently than other people do. May I say through tinted glasses?
Step 2: Look at your expectations. What do you expect from a partner? Is your list of requirements a mile long and realistic? What are the non-negotiables and what is merely the icing on the cake, sorry,I mean on a mate for you? Where would you compromise? Can the standards of this person be met without resorting to a magic wand or cosmic intervention? Are there things about yourself that you could change and improve?
If you cannot answer these questions honestly — and I admit it is dashed difficult—I suggest you get some help. Be that a trusted friend for a good heart-to-heart discussion or a professional consultant for a make-over. You need someone with an unbiased critical eye to assess what you have to offer, but above all, you need honesty for this to be working.
By taking this approach to dating, the perspective shifts away from an ever demanding me and instead, focuses subtly on your counterpart. Our “Because You Are Worth it!” generation needs a colossal shift in consciousness and become more aware of reality and what is achievable.